‘She's the village fleshlight! Everybody's had a ride.’ Austin Powers.

When I ordered my fleshlights I was so eager to get my hands (or penis) in them! On the day of the delivery the doorbell rang and I was over the moon (or something else was anyway). The postal man passed me the package and said ‘enjoy your parcel’ and gave me a wink. I knew that this would be a great day.

I steadily unpackaged the products and my erection grew larger and nearly burst my pants. It was almost comparable to the leaning tower of Pisa, only that mine was taller. Before I knew it, the plastic casing was ripped off and I was in elation. The inserts were surprisingly soft and realistic so I decided to stroke them. The amount of stroking that I did could’ve given me a place in the Australian rowing team, however I decided to defer.

I raced down to the pharmacy a block down the road to buy my lube. I was embarrassed because I have never bought anything like this in my life. The lady asked me what do you want to use the lubricant for, and I jokingly said ‘to lubricate my engine.’ Well I was technically correct in a way. Vroom vroom!

When I arrived home I ran up to the bedroom and stripped off. Next, I lubed up my lady wonder wave after sticking it into its fleshlight case. And finally, I lubed myself up! I almost had to call up ‘Lube mobile’ for some more! As I lay on my bed I prodded my penis around the opening of the lady. She was warm, wet and inviting. It was like a hot sauna, without the sauna. I couldn’t resist, so I thrusted myself into it at the speed of light. Superman would’ve been jealous.

My emotions were going wild as I was filled will awe. My extremity was being engulfed by a rolling ocean wave of tongues and I could feel a load of freely squeezed cum beginning to spurt out. It couldn’t give into the avalanche of sensation and I couldn’t hold it in. My penis erupted like an enormous volcano and a fountain of sticky lava filled the room. A large monsoon of semen flooded the floor and dripped into the lower floors of the house. After an exhausting ten minutes I sighed with relief and a smile came upon my face, ‘You bloody ripper!’
The walls were now painted white; therefore it was also a cheap paint job I thought!

Before everyone came home I had to mop up so I wrenched the towel and dried the bed and floor. Soonly enough, I carefully washed my wonder wave and removed the moisture from it. Then, I placed my wonder wave on a tower in my ventilated cupboard for next use. My penis was tired, but happy. I sang to it a lullaby and it went to sleep, ready for another day. As my penis was sleeping, it was dreaming about the next insert it would encounter the mouth speed bump and the butt ultra tight that I had got with my 3 for 2 package!

The next day I noticed that my penis was ready for another go! And yet again, it exploded, this time with the mouth speed bump. My balls were absolutely drained within an instant as I was given the best ever blowjob I have had in my life. My massive pole had become a shrimp in less than a second. Amazing! I was thinking about having my shrimp for dinner; however my ultra tight butt wanted to have a piece of the action!

In finishing, I had been holding off for a long time to buy the fleshlight but I might say that I regret my hesitation. I just love that fact that I can pummel my penis everyday of the week and it won’t have any effect on my relationships! It was definitely worth all the hype that it’s made up to be, the service was great, the delivery was astonishingly quick and I am sure anyone with one will be pleasantly surprised. It looks like I will never me using my hand again! You just gotta get one!

Thanks Fleshlight Australia!

Cheers,
Mushroom.

EDIT: Fixed up weird characters in post.

hehehehe Absolutely AWESOME testimonial Mushroom, great to hear it was everything and more that it is cracked up to be. I simply NEVER get tired or hearing testimonials like this.. although yours is the first where an entire room was dripping with cum. Although I am sure I can relate to your analogy. hehehe *winks*

I am a little concerned about the girl at the pharmacy asking you WHY you wanted the lube for.. I mean what else do you use lube for????? You should have told her something like...."my girlfriend told me if I want to have anal we need lube and lots of it" Im sure SHE would have then been the one who was embarressed... however alls well that ends well. I think this is a reminder guys that you need to purchase your lube before your order arrives so that you are ready to plunge right in. Supermarkets are a good place to buy it too.. just throw it in to your weekly groceries. Won't even get noticed. Rest assured we will have lube on our site very soon.

Thank you again for sharing your FLeshlight experience with us, and I am sure there will be many more enjoyable FLights. Each ride only gets better and better.... and in your case..WETTER!!! hehehe

Cheers
Pash
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Cheers Pash. I am sure all your partners have soaked many, many rooms.


I was about to embarras her, however I didn't because she was a fine looking chick.


Yep, it is getting better and better! I think Australia won't have any lube left the way we are going!
Thanks once again!

lol it sounds like you had a months worth of storage in there. Were you holding off until you got your new fleshies?

Oh it also seems you paid alot of attention in english at school. I haven't read such well described text in a long time

Damn right I was.
It is natural for every person to hold off until they receive their fleshlights, isn't it?


Thanks for that. I appreciate that my English is up to this forums standards.

hehehe *nods* yes... a definite nut-buster (wall paintjob)...lol

Pash
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Would you like me to paint your walls Pash?
Just kidding.

I also do carpets if you are interested?

hehehe well my walls got covered in a white creamy substance once.. carpets as well, but then we are talking a whole nuther type of sex .. LOL

lol this one is getting more and more intersting every post.

Come on pashy spill the beans

Yes, I am sure we are all mature enough for you to elaborate on that.

Was the white creamy substance mayonnaise by any chance?


I think Pash's boyfriends must have spilled the beans! (pun intended)

hahaha no it wasn't mayonaise.. it was Vaalia natural yoghurt (damn good lube and no ill effects for ladies when it goes anywhere between our legs).. boy did we give new meaning to the name 'Greek Salad' hehehe It was weeks later I was still noticing dried up splatter spots of yoghurt high on the cupboard doors LOL

Food sex ROCKS!

Im trying to work out how I can get a wading pool set up and how many tubs of yoghurt it will take to sufficiently fill it ...LOL

Vaalia natural yoghurt... I shall try that some day! (so I guess it is a case of lube first, eat later!)
LOL, that was a very funny post Pash. Your sense of humour is really getting to me.

I have never tried food-sex before, however before I had a fleshlight I tried penetrating a heated-up rockmelon every so often! What you do is you cut an opening into the fleshy editable part and have the time of your life.
Obviously the fleshlight is much better than that!

Anyone else try penetrating a weird object in order to gain a nice sensation?

I am enjoying my Fleshlight imensely everyone!

May I just add that I am finding it hard to orgasm when I use my hand now. Looks like I'm desensitized!

Fleshlight - you beauty!

woooohoooo Mushy.. great to hear *winks*

And how in the heck did I miss that post about the rockmelon????? I have read a story online, I think the link still exists because it was the prize winner for a male masturbation story. He used a grapefruit.. they called it Pulp Friction hehehehe! Wouldnt wanna have any cuts or sore spots in that region now wouldja??? I think the rocklmelon sounds a HOLE lot better.. *giggles*

Pash
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Haha, I can't stop laughing Pash! Pulp Friction - that's a good one! However I wouldn't want to get rug burns in one of those things!
Things are certainly heating up in the mushy Fleshlight world... no doubt about it.
Is it true that all normal males masturbate? Surely males cannot resist the urge. Until next time.

Mushroom.

lol it would have to be.

everyone gets horny and when u dont have a partner to assist, you gotto take matters into your own hands or fleshlight

C'mon, spill the beans fazman!

Everyone try this out! Use your fleshlight case as a cup. It works really well.
Talking about value for money!

Lol what beans u want me to spill?

And no i havent used my fleshlight case as a cup. I have enough glasses in my cupboard even two of those macca's coffee mugs

Mushroom Great Testimonial


Cya

Thanks.

I recently recieved this PM from tankman, so I will answer his question in this post.

I must say that the ultra-tight butt is the least favourite of my three inserts, mainly due to the fact that it feels mostly 'tight' rather than 'intense.' I am an average sized bloke (6 inch) however that didn't deter me from buying this Fleshlight, mainly due to the fact that the canal was comparable to the width of an anal tract (so it was the most realistic). I didn't buy the super-ribbed for this very reason.
For a person of your size, the ultra-tight inserts would suit you better because the super-tight ones may feel like you making love to a 38 year old than an 18 year old (unless you have a case which allows you to increase the suction/tightness). If you are getting a 3 for 2 deal, I would advise getting only 1 ultra-tight out of the 3, because you will need some variety in there.

As I wanted the most realistic experience possible I chose the:
Wonderwave Lady for the most accurate 'pussy' experience. (3/4 cap on)
Speed-bump Mouth for the most accurate 'blowjob' experience. (with a rubber superball)
Ultra-tight Butt for the most 'anal' experience. (1/2 cap on)

I will buy a Super-ribbed Lady and a STU soon hopefully. Maybe I could convince Fazman/Pashy if I can chuck a Mr.Limpy in there!
Cheers and I hope this helps!
I'd be happy to reply to anyone else who needs help.

Hmm wondering if there is a hint in there

LOL what hint fazman? Yes, I do have a lovely lady in my life.

I might be able to do something for u if ur buying an stu and a super ribbed

You are the man fazman! lol
I'll have a long think about it. (excuse the pun)

But then there's the mushroom

Sounds Like it hey

Well u can only try

LOL

hehehehehe....mmmmmmmm!

I hope you arnt calling my 'pole' a mushroom!


Pashy is getting excited I see. Maybe she had too many mushrooms for dinner. (nudge nudge!)

Well with a name like Mushroom???

Nothing wrong with mushrooms mate

Wish I had one!

So I take it that you are a women.

Only joking.

I love my mushies. Especially on the barbeque!

At the moment I can only afford an insert and a limpy. Oh well.

And I still haven't used my hand since.

The Fleshlight is undeniably pure brilliance and totally epic in every way.

nice to hear from you mushroom.

Good to see your back Mushroom and even better to hear your still using the fleshlight after nearly 2 years, now thats value for money!

MUSHROOOOOM!!!!!! Welcome back! hehehe

I like homemade mushroom sauce on a fillet mignon! ( i think I mentioned that before, sense of dejavu happening) lol

GREAT to hear the hand has retired from that job and still going strong with the Fleshy! Rock on! *winks*

Pash
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